Voiceover Script Success Series #6

Back to our script analysis work again.  I recently tweeted (yes I begrudgingly and very infrequently….ech….”tweet”) this comment on mastering script analysis and bringing it to the performance, “Voiceovers are a lot like the most successful relationships.  Sometimes you have to do what your partner wants, and you BOTH win.”  Believe it people.  Your partner is the writer.  You can only give him what he wants if you first KNOW what he wants.  So read read read in your head first.  I know it’s not as fun as reading out loud.  But it will make the reading out loud SO much better.  And you’ll win.

Ok men, don’t be scared.  This script is for Princess Cruise Lines.  It’s not Disney Princesses.  It’s just a big awesome boat with lots of fun things to do that takes you to cool places.  You can do this.

 

It’s truly an epic adventure, a Princess world cruise. Over 100 days, sailing across the world’s seas and visiting the most sensational destinations on earth.
The world cruise is a journey every intrepid traveler has dreamed about, and Princess can take you there.
What lies ahead of you is a galaxy of the most legendary, exiting and romantic ports in the world, destinations that will delight the mind and excite the imagination.
From the ruins of once mighty civilizations, to sparkling cosmopolitan cities, from enchanted island jewels to dramatic natural wonders, you’ll experience more in one monumental voyage than most people do in a lifetime of travel.
A Princess World Cruise, it’s an adventure of a lifetime.

 

The first sentence is a bit awkward.  You’re obviously introducing a means to an “epic adventure” – their big selling point.  You do need to “introduce” the cruise line for the first time here though, so don’t throw that away.  In the next few lines, find the hot spots: 100, world’s seas, sensational, dreamed, legendary, exciting, romantic.  Yes “in the world” has a certain drama to it.  You can use that.  What happens to your mind and imagination?  Delight.  Excite.  Those words have more bang for their buck than the words they precede.  So they take . . . precedence.  Next you focus on these places and their descriptors: once mighty civilizations, etc.  and then – you’ll experience more in, what?  One monumental voyage.  Than what?  A lifetime of travel.  On your tag line, the end, whittle it down again to the most essential elements…the POINT.  The product.  And what it stands for.  No more.  No less.  Always be ON POINT.  You can’t go wrong.

 

It’s truly an epic adventure, a Princess world cruise. Over 100 days, sailing across the world’s seas and visiting the most sensational destinations on earth.
The world cruise is a journey every intrepid traveler has dreamed about, and Princess can take you there.
What lies ahead of you is a galaxy of the most legendary, exiting and romantic ports in the world, destinations that will delight the mind and excite the imagination.
From the ruins of once mighty civilizations, to sparkling cosmopolitan cities, from enchanted island jewels to dramatic natural wonders, you’ll experience more in one monumental voyage than most people do in a lifetime of travel.
A Princess World Cruise, it’s an adventure of a lifetime.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *